A week ago, I flew from New Zealand to Australia.  As I wandered around Wellington’s gates, I discovered a book called When Breath Becomes Air. Three hours later and a solid landing, Paul Kalanithi’s raw, gentle truth of a memoir made a home in my heart.

Paul, a Stanford University neurosurgical resident and husband, was diagnosed with Stage IV metastatic lung cancer at 36 years old. So much has been shared and written about him and his book since his death. I use this blog entry to say: read this book, get to know this man…you will be reminded of what it is to be human, what it is to live in the present, what it is to be honest. (thank you, Paul)

“The fact of death is unsettling. Yet there is no other way to live.”  – Paul Kalanithi

Beauty in a Moment

There’s a chance you might catch it, like the flutter of a wren,

Out the corner of your eye, its escape to its den,

It’s the jump of the frog, when you only see the splash,

It’s the turn of a fish when you only glimpse a flash,

It’s the rustle in a bush, the tail as it goes,

It’s the sun through a water drop from the river flows,

It’s the moment that dawn breaks, or when the sun drops green,

It’s something one could miss, but it’s something I have seen,

I want to hold the moment, but I know it can’t be done,

You can’t clasp running water or it will cease to run,

You cannot catch the wind with a brown paper bag,

Remember it’s this wind that flies your waving flag,

It is this flowing water that carries you down streams,

I’d have no answer for you, if you asked me what it means,

But I know that it’s significant, when all is said and done,

Just remember beauty in that moment, whenever it may come.

(Poem: JBD / AJWT)

There is a bench inside of a rose garden within a park beside the Pacific Ocean. I sit on this bench, often, to read or write or think or meditate or look up at the sky. Beneath the bench is a plaque. On the plaque is an inscription about a man named Dennis. Dennis died in 1989, according to the plaque. I fantasize that his loving family or dearest friends made the beautiful effort to orchestrate a string of words which sing a song that is Dennis. Dennis: who always took the time to smell The Roses, it reads. I know Dennis, even though we never met.

Go to the people and places you love. Embrace, cry out, let go, start fresh. Love it all up. You belong, you are loved and you have this moment. Now, and into the future.

And, remember:

Don’t Quit by Unknown

When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,
When the road you’re trudging seems all uphill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit,
Rest, if you must, but don’t you quit.

Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As every one of us sometimes learns,
And many a failure turns about,
When he might have won had he stuck it out;
Don’t give up though the pace seems slow–
You may succeed with another blow.

Often the goal is nearer than,
It seems to a faint and faltering man,
Often the struggler has given up,
When he might have captured the victor’s cup,
And he learned too late when the night slipped down,
How close he was to the golden crown.

Success is failure turned inside out–
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt,
And you never can tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems so far,
So stick to the fight when you’re hardest hit–
It’s when things seem worst that you must not quit.

(in honor of the four year anniversary of a little idea, this blog)

xx, JBD

What can you do to get your heart overflowing this weekend? Sparks and reminders are all around. Even my best friends lovingly roll their eyes at me, but I am telling you, look out and be aware. It’s all always happening. We are alive and breathing! Bare with me a few moments more, massive stream of consciousness happening. Last month I was on yet another cross country flight. Seated next to me was a most handsome Argentinian man. We sipped red wine and shared family, career and love stories way up in the air. Six hours later it felt like our first date. Studies show your senses are heightened while flying, as in 55 percent of travelers said they had “experienced heightened emotions while flying.” Truth be told, a few years ago I was seated adjacent to another handsome (American) man who ended up my boyfriend of a year+. Things like this do happen. But back to the Argentinian…it was just a moment, we are alive and life is rad when you connect with people in the moment. We did what you do nowadays: immediate social media friending. Fast forward to a few weeks later, I’m blasting Leon Bridges’ music in my office on a Friday, creating content for a film campaign, subconscious-simultaneous scrolling of Facebook happening and low and behold the Argentinian posted the same exact song I had playing. You still with me here? If so, this is a silly, fun reminder that it is freaking Friday and it’s time to open your heart and your mind to what feels right. Roll with the patterns that pop up in your life. xx, JBD.

It’s no secret I work hard in a job I like, a lot. Yes, the constant creative change and global travel help, however the biggest reason I thrive and feel good most days is in direct correlation to the superstars I work with from the office to the road. These smart pieces of advice as told by Inc. are worth reading for your own success.

1. Carve Your Own Path

Don’t let someone else’s vision of success force you to stray from the path you worked to be on. Carve your own path and you’ll always be heading in the right direction. — Michelle Phan, co-founder of Ipsy.

2. Soak Up Knowledge From Smart People

I love the [Jim Rohn] quote “You’re the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” I’d encourage female entrepreneurs to find people that they admire and spend lots of time with those people that are more successful than they are and smarter than they are, because those are the people I’ve learned the most from. –Nanxi Liu, CEO of Enplug

3. Do It Now!

Don’t wait until you have all the answers because you will never have all the answers. –Zoe Barry, founder of ZappRx

4. 99 Percent Perspiration

Be ready to work! Business is not simply built on innovation — we’ve had a great idea in a great industry that’s required quite a bit of “perspiration” and late nights to achieve. –Adam Lyonz, founder of The Zebra

5. Find Solutions to the Right Problems

I think one of the things we did that was important was that we worked really hard to identify the right problem before identifying the solution. … If you find a problem that people talk about emotionally as a serious problem in their lives … you can take that leap to developing the solution. –Liam Don, co-founder of ClassDojo

6. Network Like a Pro

Attend as many events as possible and do your research beforehand. Knowing who you’ll be meeting with and understanding how they may be able to help you is vital. With preparation, you are instantly set up for a productive and efficient conversation once you’re face-to-face. –Kegan Schouwenburg, founder of Sols 

7. Own Your Mistakes

Your team needs to be accountable without throwing one another under the bus. Reward those who both acknowledge their own slip-ups and offer solutions to fix them. Some of the best learning can come after mistakes are identified and ultimately lead to a better product/process in the end. –Al Goldstein, CEO of Avant

8. Ask Influential People For Help

Reaching out to the right people and getting connected to influential and intelligent people has helped us do more than we ever could have done alone. –Alex White, co-founder of Next Big Sound

9. Kill Your Insecurities

As you start working on your company, you start working on yourself. Because this company is a reflection of who you are, and every single one of your insecurities are somehow going to be challenged; they are somehow going to bubble up to the surface. And you are going to have to defeat them in real time, in order to be successful at what you’re building. –Anda Gansca, founder of Knatch

10. To Thine Own Self Be True

Just be yourself. Work hard, and do something you love. Focus: do less, but do it better. And give back when you can. –Jordan Fliegel, founder of CoachUp

11. Look for Opportunity

One of the things I preach a lot about is getting in early. This means be opportunistic with things when you see something new coming onto the scene, or when you can sense that a trend is on the rise… –Jesse Tevelow, co-founder of PlayQ

12. Drive It With Data

Don’t try to count everything. Concentrate on bottom-line numbers. Collect lots of data. Feel free to change. –Douglas Hanna, founder of Help.com

13. Hire Superstars

Choose the people you work with carefully; they are more important than what you do! –Jonathan Neman, co-founder of Sweetgreen

14. Find an Outstanding Co-Founder

Find an incredible co-founder. I think both of us have found that we do better work together than we ever could alone. –Noah Ready-Campbell, CEO of Twice

15. Build, Build, Build!

1. Build stuff. 2. Make a lot of things. 3. Make a list of said things. 4. Make said list longer. –Sahil Lavingia, founder of Gumroad

Image Credit: Jenny Graham / Advice above via Inc.

I discovered Dallas Clayton’s illustrations and wonderful words a few summers ago as I sauntered through a book store, buying gifts for the cute kids of my college best friends. A Is for Awesome was my first purchase. Dallas quickly became, for me, a modern day Shel Silverstein.  And so I share his message today. I sure do hope you keep going and know what you’re worth. xx, JBD.

Text within image by Dallas Clayton

Couldn’t have said it better myself…

Image via Tomboy Style

My three brothers have taught me a lot. As I procrastinate on packing for a Central American jungle vacation, here are nine known facts of girls who grew up with a boatload of brothers.

1. Brutally honest feedback is offered like a casual hello. You will always be given a reality check. With love, but like the Real World Season 1.

2. Any group of dudes invited to the home you share with your boyfriend or husband will never, ever trump the noise and chaos of having brothers who filled up your parents’ finished basement like a frat house.

3. You have immediate, lifelong best friends who double as your bodyguards.

4. You are never the only weirdo in the room.

5. No matter the decade, you are clued into current music, sports, baby goat GIFS, and random WWE heavyweights.

6. If you get dumped you’ve got the toughest, funniest crew to put it all into perspective (and to remind you how dumb the guy was anyway)…

7. When you fall in love you’ve got the toughest, funniest crew to test the new guy’s sense of humor and his intentions for dating you.

8. You are a diplomatic, patient, strong woman because growing up with brothers gave you stellar problem-solving skills and honed an inherent ability to communicate.

9. You’ve got invaluable insight into how men think and will always be able to laugh at yourself.

Image via IMBD